#21: time waster
I saw this on my old team’s forum. It is sort of stupid, but I like it.
Here is what I came up with.
- Every time someone uses the word “intense”, Ryan always replies “you know what else is intense?” followed by a roundhouse kick to the face.
- Ryan doesn’t say “who’s your daddy”, because he knows the answer.
- Ryan killed for your sins.
- Ryan once ordered a steak in a restaurant. The steak did what it was told.
- Ryan can kick through all 6 degrees of separation, hitting anyone, anywhere, in the face, at any time.
- Give a man a fish, and you will feed him for a day. Give a man anything that is better than a fish, and Ryan will beat his ass and take it.
- and so on….
Go ahead try it. Tell me something about yourself.
Ryan knows everything there is to know - Except for the definition of mercy.
Ryan can drink his own weight in Beef Gravy.
Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Ryan to go around.
Ryan can slam revolving doors.
Comment by ryan — June 27, 2007 @ 7:52 pm
Andrea doesn’t have a bank account. She just tells the bank how much he needs.
Anytime someone is elected president in the United States, they must ask permission from Andrea to live in the White House. The reason for this is because Andrea had won every Federal, State, and Local election since 1777. She just allows others to run the country in her place.
Andrea is expected to win gold in every swimming competition at the 2008 Beijing Olympics, even though Andrea does not swim. This is because when Andrea enters the water, the water gets out of her way and Andrea simply walks across the pool floor.
I think these are just recycled Chuck Norris facts
Comment by akcreasy138 — June 28, 2007 @ 7:17 am
I’m bored, here are some more…
Andrea created the Matrix.
Andrea was what Willis was talkin’ about.
Godzilla is a Japanese rendition of Andrea’s first visit to Tokyo.
Andrea roundhouse kicks don’t really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
Andrea and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
Comment by akcreasy138 — June 28, 2007 @ 1:04 pm